THE BAR

Good luck to my fiancee and all the other zillions of folks (but mostly my fiancee) taking the Massachusetts bar today! And tomorrow! See you at the bar after the bar!

Speaking of the hardest test you've ever taken in your entire life, I am reminded of Mrs. Bachman, my high school chemistry teacher. She used to make up 3 or sometimes 4 different versions (color-coded and nicknamed after an element on the periodic table) of tests based on where you sat in the room. Those were the most extreme measures I think a teacher ever went to to see that there wasn't any cheating. Oh Mrs. Bachman.

Obviously, that's nothing compared to the measures the bar folks are taking. Each person is allowed a gallon size, clear plastic bag containing a short list of outlined items (like pencils, clear containers for your lunch if you're bringing one, tissues, your wallet, your house keys, and such). And ladies, if you're at that time of the month, that means your feminine products will be out there in plain sight for everyone to see -- and inspect, if necessary, since they go through your gallon bag upon entry to the test. Each test-taker has to have a completely clear water bottle, and they aren't allowed to bring their cell phones, wear hoods or bring umbrellas. What if it rains, bar testing people? What then? You'll have a bunch of unhappy, stressed out, and now wet test takers on your hands, that's what. Have fun grading 10 drippy essays from each person.

I'm not even taking the bar and I'm psyched for it to be over. Jess will be done with the hardest exam of her life, and that's quite an accomplishment! It'll be November before we know if she's passed, but that's alright.

I'm also excited because she'll start acting like normal Jess again in that she'll probably stop seeing everything through the Law Lens. I can't even imagine the volume of law crap that is in that head of hers. Some of it has spilled onto topics way outside the law - like our dogs. It was actually brought up recently that if Emma were to enter a contract and she was worried (within reason) that the other person wasn't going to go through with their end of the bargain, she could ask for further assurances. But then, Emma's a dog and not a person, so the contract isn't likely to be honored or valid in the first place. WOW. That was unprompted, and over breakfast.

Also, I hear after leaving the exam, everything just floats out of the test taker's head. They have been stuffing so much information from so many varied topics of law into their head, that after finally dumping it out on test day(s), it is flushed out of the system immediately. One person said they forgot 25% of what they learned for the exam right after they walked out the door. That's crazy! But good: Jess had expressed concern that her memories were being replaced one by one with law. Maybe after the exam, those memories will come back. I can see it now, we'll just be sitting there, staring into space after she detoxes from the exam (and from the post-bar bar Thursday night), and she'll say something like, "oh, I remember the 6th grade science fair again!"

Also, starting on Friday, Jess and I will be two unemployeds searching for jobs and doing funemployment stuff together! Wheeeee!