But the girl next to me didn't seem to think so, and she fell asleep around take off. During her fitful sleep, she kind of kicked around a lot, and I remember thinking that she must have been one of those kids who kicked the backs of other people's chairs in movie theaters and airplanes. I wanted to wake her "by accident," but I didn't. I just kept on sipping on my Orangina and thinking back on my trip. Actually, I'm pretty sure I wrote in a journal of some kind (note to self: must find journal and see if there is any further evidence of budding authorship).
I was probably writing something about Toledo, my favorite part of the trip, when the sleeping idiot next to me flailed herself awake. During said flail, she punched my Orangina. It sailed upward through the air in slow motion and we both just kind of looked at it, waiting to see what it would do next. It crashed onto my backpack, which, luckily, was waterproof so nothing inside was damaged. She was embarassed and wiped up the Orangina splatters. I figured everything was fine. So my bag was now orange-scented. So what?
We were walking through the airport after retrieving our baggage, when a very cute beagle approached me. On his back, he wore a little jacket that said something like "fruit and plant sniffer dog." "Oh crap," I thought to myself. Sure enough, the beagle's human counterpart "pulled me over."
Fruit Dog's Cop Counterpart: Miss, I'm sorry to stop you, but my friend here seems to think you have taken some plants out of Spance. May I search your bag?
Me: Oh, yeah, ugh sure. It's just that, I know what he smells.
FD's CC: Really?
Me: Oh yeah, it's the Orangina.
FD's CC: You have Orangina in your bag?
Me: More like on my bag...
At this point I explained. He searched the bag anyway, but surprisingly didn't find the marajuana I had taken out of Spance (I kid, I kid). We had a good chuckle about the Orangina and he sent me on my way.
Two things:
- I want his job.
- Can I train Emma and/or Sparki to be a Fruit Dog? Emma already looks like a fruit bat half the time, so we must be half way there, right?
No comments:
Post a Comment